I was born and grew up in Germany with two younger siblings and parents who loved us very much. My parents, both children during the second world war, longed for a life of harmony and happiness. As the oldest, I learned to play the role of fulfilling their longing in many ways. And as we were all artistically talented, we each found our own path to make our parents happy and proud of us… I grew up thinking we had a really happy childhood.
Then, during high school, a relative I was very close to suddenly became silent and withdrawn, increasingly depressed and then even anorexic. She started to see a therapist, but her condition didn’t change. For the first time in my life I felt helpless… I didn’t know how to respond to this challenge. It felt like I was supposed to do something to restore happiness in some way, but didn’t know how. I longed to understand what had caused her to feel this way and began searching for answers, but only found a few pieces to the puzzle. When she finally healed and started to laugh again, it was a mystery I didn’t fully understand.
During those high school years I also followed my love for music and studied violin and classical singing. After finishing Gymnasium, my desire to understand human nature brought me to study Psychology and Anthropology for a year, but the University structure left me confused and dissatisfied… and my passion for art emerged. I switched to study abstract painting at Art Academies in Hamburg, New York and Düsseldorf. For almost 10 years I completely dedicated my life to making art.
In 1989 I moved with my high school sweetheart and first husband, who was now an art dealer, to the US. After the birth of our second daughter, in 1992, I was faced with a new challenge, confronted with a new level of helplessness as I witnessed our first daughter acting out in inexplicable anger against her newborn baby sister. For the first time I knew I needed help. I pulled away from my painting studio. Absorbed with finding ways to become a better mother and fascinated by childhood psychology, I started therapy and created a parent coaching group. Soon I was also drawn to explore healing work, metaphysics and channeled information.
The next decade was full of new discoveries, learning and growing. I began to practice healing arts, first with Reiki, which soon led me to Shamanic Healing through Soul Retrievals. Next I learned Hypnosis. I went through a great deal of inner growth and change as my marriage came apart. True to my role, I focused on creating the most loving separation I could imagine.
After living through seven years of predominantly single parenting, my wonderful second husband joined our little family in 2002. During that time I was doing healing work on the side, still thinking I had to look for a “proper” job.
In May of 2003 an epiphany gave me the clarity to open Free Soul, my private practice for healing and transformation work.
In 2004 I found a powerful cellular healing work called the Journey and became an accredited Journey Practitioner in 2006. What an amazingly rich learning experience that was! The Journey became my primary healing modality for 6 years. I started traveling to Germany twice a year and grew a significant client base in Hamburg.
In 2011 a fellow Journey Practitioner introduced me to FutureVisioning™, which I experienced as an even more deeply transformative work. After a short custom training period that allowed me to clear up some significant old prosperity blockages, my practice virtually exploded. In November of 2011 I entered a mentorship program with the man who created this work: Ti Caine. Just one month earlier my father had died after two years of pain and illness.
Through this work I was also introduced to Lazaris, the channeled, nonphysical being who was the source of knowledge and inspiration behind FutureVisioning. It was the beginning of a most profound new relationship for me. Lazaris delivers such a wealth and depth of wisdom and understanding in our human nature, that it initially often boggled my mind. To this day I consider Lazaris my most beloved teacher.
Over the next three years I was one of the select few practitioners in the world, offering the formidable process of FutureVisioning™, which at the time I considered to be the most powerful personal healing and growth work I knew. I even created a program in Germany to train a first pioneering group of practitioners in this work. They went on to making this work more widely available in Germany under the names of: FutureV, Futuring and FutureVisioning.
In the spring of 2014 several fundamental disagreements erupted between me and Ti Caine, differences that had been buried by my old need to protect peace and harmony above everything else. Besieged by my mentor’s relentless efforts to squelch my beliefs and deny my difference of opinion, I had to birth the courage to trust my own perceptions and choices, to stand up for my beliefs, and to oppose an authority figure I had believed in, in a way I had never dared to my entire life. In June I decided to leave the FutureVisioning group.
That decision liberated me in many ways. But it also catapulted me into a phase of renewed questioning and a desire to redefine what kind of client relationship it was that I wanted to engage in and what tools I wanted to work with.
As it turned out I entered a longer period of unwinding than I had anticipated. My focus was soon drawn to another area altogether by my mother’s illness and death that same year. During the emotional transition into parentless life I now felt called to embody the role of an elder, and questions emerged about what it meant to fill that role. Another inevitable change involved creating an adjustment in the relationship with my two siblings, and pursuing the task to resolve a whole array of inheritance questions back in Germany.
The final component in this extended phase of letting go was the sale of our home in the summer of 2015. As the plunge in the US housing market left us without any remaining assets, we discovered a creative opening in the opportunity to also reexamine our values around living spaces, and explore future models for intentional community living.
In the continued pursuit of recreating my private work with clients, my husband Jimmy and I were led to experience another extraordinary set of tools to create our life with. Avatar. This time it was my oldest daughter whose inspiration we followed. I was struck by the enormous clarity, ease and speed in the application of the amazing Avatar tools, the palpable sense of a compassionate worldwide community, the astonishing absence of indulging in emotional drama, and the complete freedom to explore the impact of my own beliefs on my life. Avatar is the most systematically organized, complete school of highly effective reality creation and personal well-being tools I have yet encountered.
How does it fit in with my previous healing disciplines, and how does it add to my private work?
The Avatar tools can only be learned in one of the 9 day Avatar International Courses. This experience is one I highly recommend to anybody wishing to supercharge the evolution of their consciousness. It’s an incredibly fast route that brings you to a very high level of self-determination and targeted self-empowerment. You’ll find more details on my Avatar page.
Of course I had been practicing and teaching Lazaris’ approach to reality creation for more than four years prior to my Avatar experience; so I already used a very active internal map of how to create consciously. To me that definitely felt like a benefit while going through the Avatar courses, even though it initially also caused a little bit of confusion. Overall it enabled me to reach farther and higher than without it.
As for my private work, I always knew about the importance of holding the space for a loving connection to grow. In April 2016 I suddenly had a flash of clarity about the very core of my new work: I saw the power in the amazing alchemy of engaging in joint exploration of a personal issue. At the heart of this insight was the recognition of my capacity to champion another human being by seeing beyond the veil of their current limitations and holding them in their own highest vision, while guiding them in gathering their own personal tools for an empowered reality creation.
I call this new work Reflective Awakening. I have been offering this work since May 2016, and I see it both as a complement, preparation and an alternative to the Avatar courses. You’ll find more details on my Reflective Awakening page.