Dear friends, dear community,
You have not heard from me in almost a whole year, I feel it is high time for an update!
Jimmy and I spent over nine months last year caring for my ex-husband Constantin. Initially we were very hopeful after we found a brand new cutting edge treatment protocol that has shown to reverse Alzheimers. We were also lucky to find a doctor, who had just been trained in this approach, living very close to us in West Stockbridge. And while we were excited to actually find the underlying root cause of his condition, to know it was caused by heavy metal and mold toxicity, in the end we had to realize that his illness had already progressed too far. We had to adjust our expectation and began to understand that we won’t be able to give him his cognitive abilities and his independence back.
It was a challenging year.
Caring for someone at this intense level, pretty much around the clock, was a new experience for both of us and a heavy burden on our relationship. For the first three months we did not have any relief and time away from the relentless onslaught of demands for attention, except during weekend visits from Sophia, Anina, or Constantin’s partner Karlo.
It was very difficult to let go of trying to communicate with a once rational person by using logic, common knowledge and obvious facts to relieve his many different, ever recurring anxieties. The realization that these means of experiencing reality don’t reach him any longer was hard to accept. Interacting with him day in day out made it inescapably obvious how we each do create our own separate bubble of reality, and how we can’t alter anybody’s internal make up and their resulting experiences, as painful as they may be, unless they are deliberately looking for such a change.
In February we began looking for a new living situation for him and found a house near Hudson, where he now lives with Sophia and her boyfriend Oleg. Thankfully they are supported there by two daytime care givers. In May we finally moved him into his new house. We also emptied out half of our storage to add our Old Chatham furniture to provide for his guest and dining rooms, and needed to vacate our current rental, as the owners were scheduled to come back for their summer vacation. On May 18th we – at last – got to escape to Germany for two and a half months. An extraordinarily blissful experience of freedom and privacy!
We sadly notice that his cognitive abilities keep deteriorating. Sometimes I think that we may have just missed the juncture from where recovery and healing could have still happened by perhaps not that much time. In such moments I remind myself to contemplate that our soul contract as a family group must have included this development with all the ensuing emotional exchanges, and that his soul in that regard is probably very much on track. Ours too for the matter. And that always leads me to ask the most important question: what was it that each of us wanted to learn by weaving through these experiences? How did we want to grow from it?
I myself felt a first sprinkle of answers when I went with a dear friend to a lecture by the dutch anthroposophist Rinke Visser at a Camp Hill Ghent event.This lovely man not only looked so much like my grandfather that I had an eery sense of seeing someone in front of me I already dearly knew, but he also spoke about his own experience in working with dementia patients from an enlightening soul’s perspective that touched me deeply. I came away from that evening with several significant insights, one of them: if I have a human being close to me in my life, who is forgetting who he is, then I too must have forgotten something about who I am. And what’s more: if this disease is occurring at an ever accelerating pace all over the world, then we as humans must have forgotten something significant about who we are as well.
My first encounter with such writings had been in the early 90’s, when I was drawn to the Barbara Marciniac books, the first information from the Pleiadeans I ever encountered. Back then I only assembled a very vague internal map of what it was they were conveying to us. Then my interest faded.
Over the last two decades I was much more attracted to learning from non-physical beings. I was inspired by the Abraham-Hicks material and even more so by Lazaris, who became such a beloved teacher for me. I think perhaps I wanted to leave the messiness of our physical life-form behind, to reach for something more pure and more evolved. I now wonder if that is the place to find it. It seems to me that all perspectives come with a distinct point of view.
Then, during the winter 2015/16, reading the “Prism of Lyra” felt like a revelation to me. I suddenly saw a new and bigger picture. I learned about the Lyrans, the Arcturians, the Vegans, the Orions, the Sirians and the Zetas. And I grasped a first understanding that there is an actual, interconnected galactic history, and that we earth humans play a specific part among the large variety of many species and civilizations that make up the stepping stones in the evolution toward higher and higher consciousness.
So this spring I picked the thread up again and started reading ferociously. I soaked up the descriptions of alien civilizations that have left the struggles of third density or three dimensional life behind, who have reached fourth or higher densities. I learned from a Yahyellian, a Sirian, the Hathors, another Pleiadean council and from a collection of 15 different humanoid civilizations from planets in star systems I had never even heard of before. I was particularly struck that – as different as they are – there are some distinct similarities: none of them have governments, nor schools as part of an education system, and there is no trace of engaging in secrets, lies or manipulations, as communication is mostly telepathic. There is neither money, jobs, careers nor duties as part of a “work to make a living” concept, nor the concept of separating an allotted time for recreation either. Instead I found a recurring theme of doing what is most joyful or exciting, and of following the stirrings of the heart as the only true compass through life. All of these races have much longer life spans, their physical bodies often digest food without creating any waste products, and they don’t know any illness. Seems so very blissful to me!
I also found publications from “regular humans” here on earth, disclosing secret layers of global developments that have been hidden from us, research of the exchanges between us humans and extraterrestrials throughout time, and other aspects of earth history that are not taught in history classes. Much fascinating, mind boggling and sometimes also disturbing stuff that rapidly expanded my personal point of view and provided yet more pieces to the astronomical puzzle of life in our galaxy.
So, what am I doing with all this new information?
That is exactly the question.
I know I want to take enough time to digest all of what I absorbed, but also continue gathering more sources of communication, more historic research and alien view sheds into our reality.
For that reason I am not reopening my private practice right now. I am not sure if that is the best contribution to our world I can make at this time.
From what I understand we are right now at a huge juncture in our evolution, and whether we are going into a global relapse of war and destruction or experience a leap into a rising consciousness into fourth density depends very much on our individual vibrations and our emotional response to events around us. Yes, here too we need to remember that we each create our own reality, and our individual bubble will either sail higher and higher or remain stuck in fear, greed, separation, and the temptation to use power to control others. We each choose where we go! We are each at the center of our own universe! More mind boggling stuff for sure. What’s happening right now becomes more comprehensible when we understand the existence of parallel time lines.
Personally I feel a stirring and an excitement in my heart about three areas:
First I feel a desire to spend much of my time around nature, tending to the earth, and since I too still need to make money, I will work for a small local landscaping company until it gets too cold in November.
Next I want to explore a new movement called Ubuntu. It is an amazing concept toward a money-less civilization based on “Contributionism”. I would love to open a dialogue with other people who are curious and interested in this concept. Let me know if you are. www.ubuntuplanet.org
And lastly, since I know that our ability to follow our joy can only flourish in an environment of self love, I want to pick up my program on Self Love and create a new, more polished version for a book to provide an easy to follow training that gently and joyfully weaves those skills and practices into our daily life. Self Love is the most powerful medicine: it raises our personal vibration, overcomes the barriers of seperateness and heals the wounds of shame, agression, and abandonement.
Let me know if you would like to participate in a new pilot test group later this year.
Also: if you are interested you can use the links below to my complete reading list
Much love, as always,
Tomma’s Reading List
Barbara Marciniac: Bringers of the New Dawn
Barbara Marciniac: Earth
John E. Mack: Abduction
Lyssa Royal: The Prism of Lyra
Lyssa Royal: Visitors from Within
Lyssa Royal: Millenium
Tom Kenyon: Acrturian Anthology
Ardy Sixkiller Clarke: Sky People, Untold Stories of Alien Encounters in Mesoamerica
Jefferson Viscardi, Shaun Swanson: Avatars of the Phoenix Lights
Jefferson Viscardi, Brad Johnson: Insights with Adronis
Melissa Kennedy, Tom Kenyon: The great Human Potential
Jefferson Viscardi, Rob Gauthier: Extraterrestial Life, Galactic Humans
Brad Johnson’s U-Tube channel with an amazing collections of free videos channeling Adronis:
Tom Kenyon’s free collection of sound meditations he offers on his website (I find them very powerful and use them on a daily basis):